EVAN: *sits back down and shuffles his feet* Well . . . I read a lot. And I give piano lessons once in awhile if somebody really wants them and doesn't mind, you know, learning from me . . . but only to adults. Or if there's somebody else there. Because there was this girl in my building who wanted to learn to play piano, but I didn't think it was really a good idea because she was only thirteen and, well, you know . . . *trails off* So her mom came over with her once a week and made dinner while I taught her how to play, because they couldn't actually afford lessons but I don't really know how to cook anything that doesn't come out of a box . . . and then I have a fish tank and a little garden sort of thing in the window, so I take care of that . . . *blushes, because he's really shy*
KT CLONE: *gasps* W-wh-wh-WHAT? Wilson, you - you - *tears well up* YOU'VE BEEN CHEATING ON ME?
WILSON: What? No! I mean -
KT CLONE: Oh, I hate my life! *runs sobbing into whichever room currently contains Mark and Detective Green*
MARKIE: *raises eyebrow* Daaaaamn.
ANGEL: Aren't you so glad I really don't have much of anything against consensual polygamy?
MARKIE: *raises eyebrows*
WILSON: *looks helpless*
"Alright." Mark mutters, leaning up against Detective green, singing softly under his breath as Det. Green rubs the sponge up and down his back
"I find a little fellow whose cute and green...and...SEXY!!"
"Yes." Hedwig nods, clinging tightly to Frank's arm. "I find your miraculous ability to appear and disappear randomly EXTREMELY SEXY... can you shoot me with a transit beam so I can do it too?"
The corpse of Adam Pascal walks over to Evan, sitting himself on his lap.
WILSON: *sputters and is incoherent*
KT CLONE: *skids into bathroom and screams* AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!!!ONE!1!!!!
EVAN: *screams, jumps up, and runs to cower in corner, where he sits sobbing*
MOLLY: *kicks The Corpse of Adam Pascal in the balls, stomach, and everywhere else for scaring Evan and then runs over to Evan* Evan! Are you ok?! How dare that disgusting corpse sit down on your lap! *wraps her arms around Evan to comfort him* There, there. It's okay now. That nasty corpse won't come near you again *louder so the corpse can hear* because if he does, I will tear him apart and make him wish he had never been born or died!!! *in soothing voice* You're okay now. I won't let anyone harm you.
2007-01-29 01:27 am (UTC)
Don't hit the corpse of Adam Pascal!
The corpse of Adam Pascal bites his lower lip, or what was left of it. “I’m sorry.” He whimpers, covering his face with his hands. “I was just trying to be friendly!!”
Johnny Depp appears suddenly, taking a break from filming Sweeny Todd. “HELLO EVERYBODY!”
2007-01-29 02:20 am (UTC)
Re: Don't hit the corpse of Adam Pascal!
MOLLY: *retorts* It's not like you can feel it! You're dead which means that your nerve endings are dead too! And besides, you scared Evan! Don't you know he's sensitive?! I don't like it when people scare him! *to Evan* I'll never let anyone hurt you.
EVAN: *screams, pulls away from Molly, and cowers*
KT's eyes widen and she grips Wilson's hands tightly as she spots the KT Clone again, trying not to faint. "What the hell, Wilson? Have you been cloning me so that you can have more fun when I'm at work, or is there some long lost twin sister I don't know about?"
"Now that's a word I like!" Green replies, wrapping his arm around Mark. "If I were a teacher, you'd get an A+++++++++." He then notices the KT Clone in the room. "Uh.... sorry KT. But if you wanna use the toilet, you gotta go somewhere else. This room is occupied."
"I would love to, babe," Frank says, stroking his finger's in Hedwig's hair. "But Riffraff took that fucking transit beam back to Transylvania. Hmm. I guess we could always have a time warping road trip over there..."
April screams like the fangirl groupie she is. "OMG! JOHNNY DEPP IS BACK IN DA HOUSE!" She pauses and waits. "OMG! AND I'M CURED! Johnny might as well be my new doctor. Then I could call him Dr. McSexyAss."
Roger looks over at April confusedly. "What? But we used to play that game!"
"Yeah, and you sucked at it," April says.
Cha-Cha walks over to Molly. "Whoa, chill out a little, hon! That's pretty unsensitive of yourself."
LITTLE ANGEL: That was really mean! It's not nice to kick people!
MOLLY: I assure you he can't feel it! When you die, your nerve endings die! I just want him to realize that he can't just go and sit down on people whenever he feels like it, especially if that person is oober sensitive! *starts to cry* It's the nanny in me coming out! Someone once tried to steal one of my charges by sitting down next to her, and it scared me, just like when he *points at the corpse* sat down on Evan. *to Evan* I was just trying to make sure you didn't get hurt. I knew he wouldn't be able to feel it. *needs a hug and grabs Little Angel and hugs her because Little Angel is the cutest thing to ever exist* Little Angel don't think I'm mean! I just am really protective of people I care about! Like if anyone ever tried to hurt you, they'd be sorry! *to Evan* I'm sorry. I just didn't want you getting hurt. *continues to hug Little Angel and cry*
MOLLY: *has an afterthought* And I can't help it sometimes! My mun has been watching a lot of crime shows lately and is making me be violent! So to an extent, it's not my fault! Blame my mun, not me!
WILSON: What? I - no! I mean, I THINK she's a clone, but I didn't bring her here! I mean - I think I was the one who said something about a clone of you, it was too many posts ago to remember, but I didn't expect another you to just come falling out of the sky!
KT CLONE: *screams and faints*
EVAN: *sits in the corner with his arms wrapped around his knees and whimpers*
NINA: Wow, I'm being IGNORED by my boyfriend AND my mun! Way to go, Nina-mun!
THE VOICE OF NINA-MUN: SHUT UP OR I'LL TURN YOU BACK INTO A WOMAN . . .
NINA: But I AM a - *remembers her ahem, bits* oh, yeah . . . nevermind. *goes back to being ignored*
"Just because I don't have nerve endings doesn't mean I don't have feelings!" The corpse of Adam pascal sobs.
"Yay!" Mark squeals, licking Detective Green's cheek. "Oh my GOD, you taste like an ANGEL!"
Hedwig pouts, upset that the transit beam was gone, but then perks up again when Frank suggests they do the time warp. "Ooooh yes, lets!"
Johnny grins. "Why thankyou April, I would love to be your Doctor Mcsexyass...!"
EVAN: *is clueless* .....What?
RICHARD: *spits out a mouthful of liquor while laughing at Evan*
LITTLE ANGEL: *hates seeing people cry,hugs Molly back* I know you're not a meanie,you actually seem really nice...it's just that you hurt the corpses' feelings. He scared me when I first met him but I got to know him and he is a good zombie. He's really very nice. Why can't we all just love eachother? You both seem sad so why don't you hug and be friends? It'll make you both feel better....then we can all be happy! *smiles*
JESSE: *pats The Corpse of Adam Pascal's back*
COLLINS: What did we miss?
LITTLE MIMI: *gasp* You said a bad wooord! You said 'bitch!'
LITTLE MAUREEN: No, he said 'bitches'.
LITTLE EVAN: *is silent*
LITTLE HEATHER: *bites lip to keep from laughing*
BOHO GIRL: *smirk* These kids learn fast,don't they?
DAPHNE: Ah, the 'bitch' stage...
HEATHER: Good times...
ROSARIO: *is grinning like a fool*
JONATHAN: Little bohemians in the making!
MIMI: I told you 'I've had a knack from way back!' *laughs at her own 'joke'*
"Well... now what are we going to do with her?" KT asks. "She... I mean... I... seem really unstable. And there's only room enough for one egotistical hand around here."
"Do I?" Green asks. "And you like it? Lemme see what /you/ taste like." He licks. "Hmm. You taste like spearmint gum. But I LOVE spearmint..."
"Well..." begins Frank. "It's just a jump to the left..." He jumps.
April jumps and claps her hands. "Yay! Hold on!" She momentarily exits the room, then comes running back with Richard Gomez's infamous towel. "Okay Johnny! Now put this on!"
Roger, who is getting severely depressed again, wanders back over to Jesse, because Jesse rules the world. "Jesse L. Martin, I think you need to use your awesome Jesse powers and make the lives of me and this dead guy who kinda looks like me a lot better."
Cha-Cha frowns again and gives The Corpse of Adam Pascal a kiss on the cheek, and then skips over to the next sad person she sees, Nina. "Hey, baby. What's got you so down right now?"